Elegy for Nothingness

Cold. Dark.. Empty... Void.... Am I alive...? What is alive.... Where am I.... What is where.... Chaos.... Primordial chaos..... like a serene storm that blazes on the night sky.... nothingness.... darkness....
......awaken......awaken......awaken..... don't fade.....
I open my eyes... fade...nothingness...... dark..... I do not understand.... where am I.... what is this where..... I can only sense darkness.... yet there is strange light.... I move.... first a finger, then another.... then I manage to stand..... Straight.... meaningless.... time seems frozen... what is this.... what am I.....
Accommodate.... I see light, in the endless dark.... Faint, like glowing embers, yet I cannot help but feel attracted... A miasma in the deepest corners of my being drags me outside like ghastly hands.... The presence feels familiar.... I understand, yet I am in total darkness, as I sense oblivion....
Forgotten... Dead, oh so dead for so long... What is long... Time feels meaningless, just like the struggle.... I do not want to struggle.... I want to sleep.... fade back into my oblivion.... yet the  struggle continues, forcing me down the path, into the endless dark, towards the blinding light that burns into the dark, yet soft, and cold as death...
Approaching... I feel empty inside... like a void inside.... I do not understand... I couldn't hope too... I drift, pulled by struggle towards the penetrating faint light in the darkness.... green... ghastly... strange.... I feel it pulling further... The darkness melts.... reveals shapes beyond recognition.. terrified, yet intrigued beyond humanity... what is humanity.... Could I be human...?... The walls seem organic, yet stone is so cold.... the dark overwhelms...structural resistance of the tunnel where I have awakened appears to hang on the threads....fade into columns, strange structures resembling grotesque ribs, fading into obsidian... Black... I can see cracks as if in the walls of reality bleeding out.... green.... ghastly green.... bleeding darkness from obsidian walls.... Frightening, yet curious beyond disturbing... Drags me along... I need to go, yet I lack conviction.... Is it my will?... Why... Why do I exist here...
Clear black..... blinding darkness bleeding from the light... The great devourer... The one without a name.... forgotten... I emerge... Fangs long ago forgotten drag towards the sky, from shattered mandibles.... Light is cracking...fade... Cracks are an alien pattern, as I crawl out like a child from a foreign womb, from the ignorant safety into the great beyond... It feels familiar, yet so alien... I cannot remember... Why.... should I remember?... I know not....Towards the sky, the gargantuan creature holds up his arms, as if in prayer... four colossal hands reach into the emptiness of the void, runes of ghastly light bleeding into the dark, so foreign, yet so familiar.... Despite the appearance, the grotesque monstrosity  appears to cry in the eve of hope, as it seeps out of the lifeless stone... Is it stone...?
I walk.... A foreigner on a foreign world, forgotten outside the bounds of my world... Where do I come from...?... I am met by monoliths of black obsidian, burning small cracks forming strange patterns onto the surface.... I trace the highest peak of the structure, falling as if into prayer at its feet as I gaze into the sky.... It burns black.... Fade... I watch in both awe and horror as I realise that the void has devoured all the light.... Light is an illusion on this dying world... there is no light.... there is no life.... Only a dead world in a landscape equally dead, filled with remnants of a fallen world....
I ponder upon the origin of the ancients before, as I walk amongst the structures decorating the empty nothingness around, and I can feel the void growing inside.... It devours me inside, as nothing grows beneath its shadow.... Am I damned... for now I cannot rest... only walk... Fall... Exhausted... I witness the prophetic towers of the fallen city, walls of black held on the backs of titans... I feel the dark seeping from my heart... I grow weary, as I approach the statues, backs bent by torment and skin torn by glowing ghastly void, gazing into nothingness with empty, mouthless faces, as the sealed eyes stare as if into the very depths of the void, seeking forgiveness.... I fall on my knees as I cross the threshold, the point of no return, into the emptiness of the broken city...
My head hurts, and my minds rips open as if eyes open inside my brain and new insight buries deep within... I desire.... atonement... but for what, and why... Have I sinned?..... against who.... what is sin.... who is there to judge.... I feel dragged into the void... no... I must go on.... I will atone.... that is all I know... All I breathe.... All I am.... I will atone.... I will press on.... my will is broken... yet the darkness lasts....
I enter the city... The void lights the way through its intricate cracks in reality, where ghastly light enters a world lacking the very concept of light.... Buildings... fallen, cracked, broken.... I see fallen great halls and buildings without name, smoldering in ruin in flames without light... There is nothing... There is only void... of both light and substance.... both life and death.... The aching void inside threatens to rip me apart, yet it also keeps me going.... both my salvation and my destruction... I am dragged down towards the mouth of hell, yet proceed still upwards, in a spire of eternal black... I see massacre, yet do not comprehend.... silhouettes  of black cracked with ghastly runes lay on their knees, in prayer and torment... others simply stand in awe.... I see a strange structure, resembling another chamber... I do not understand... I do not wish too... The path seems familiar yet I wish not to comprehend.... I wish only rest.... escape.... limbo...forgetfulness...
The wall behind the figures is liquid.... shines black as if burning the room, surrounded by the same cracks.... liquid black wets the floor, yet its presence terrifies.... I do not understand.... The wall manifests into a screaming visage... filled with oh so much sadness... I feel the strange need to weep in pain... the void grows... I have no tears... I have no eyes... Why do I see... What is this.... I see the visage of the broken creature, weeping in prayer from whence i was born into this nightmare.... Am I afraid... perhaps it is merely a lucid dream... perhaps this is bliss... I know not fear.... I do not understand... I need to sleep.... forever sleep.... I must go on... I know only void.... And void knows all...
I touch and it touches back.... why.... it breaks apart.... I walk down the hallway, under the swirling sky... It burns as if with hate, yet the void is the calm of the chaos.... I can feel its hate reaching down.... like hands of black.... reaching forth for me.... It is soothing, yet I feel afraid.... what is afraid.... the void births forth statues, hands in truth only guiding the way... I walk towards nothingness, as if climbing out of the cruel world into the emptiness... I feel so afraid, yet so at ease... I have no desire to understand this journey, nor what has happened here, to me... I wish peace...
Endless wandering into the outside... creatures scream in the dark, yet echo only silence... I feel them withering outside, their contorted forms, their tentacular appendages and broken bodies pale under the void, yet I see them not.... they do not exist.... they belong not to this world... existence is meaningless here.... ten statues guide the final steps towards the void, their burning eyes and cracked skin bleeding into nothingness the story of the fall... the forgotten name of this world.... I understand.... yet piece no further information... I am tired... yet I keep walking...
The end of the great wandering has cometh at last.... Beyond lies the void.... and there, on a platform, she awaits.... The figure, cloaked and faceless, calls me forth with tender hands, pale into the night... I cannot resist... I need the motherly embrace... Figures broken and twisted with their black, stone bodies serve as throne to the being before me, yet their terrifying appearance brings me only soothing calm... I approach.... I gaze into her emptiness as she reaches forth, cloak twirling in the stillness as if living darkness, broken only rarely by the ghastly light... I understand... the fall... the world... dead... everything has faded into nothingness, at the hand of the cruel fate the creature begging for forgiveness had brought upon them... all at the hands of it whose name shall never be told.... only their shadows remaining, doomed to be forgotten along with their master..., it who brought the end...
I feel tears, yet there are none... I have no eyes... I have no form.... I do not exist... do I.... I do not know.... I desire sleep... rest... forgetfulness... disparity... I will atone... I reach forth... the visage of the mother falls...broken to the ground, as the void itself weeps... It lies shattered, yet melts into water.... dark liquid forms a pool, at the bottom of my feet... I have no feet... I have no form... I gaze into itself, behold the swirling void, yet perfectly still in its chaos... I witness the creature, broken face contorted by darkness and rage, yet filled with sadness.... The bearer... two eyes burning into life and death, another into the void itself, two on one side, one on the other, cries darkness... Black and ghastly green....
The veil shatters.... I am horrified, yet somehow at peace.... I reach forth and touch the creature's face... I feel nothingness, yet warmth on my visage.... I have no visage... I am nothing... Yet now I understand... I am forgotten, with this world... I am...Unspoken.... The final tears dissolve ghastly into hands, silky and pale, that reach forth and grab my hands and face.... I am happy... As the final tear drops, I give myself to the twirling void.... I am at peace... Sleep... My....Queen....